will the real slim shady please stand up?

if you’re a blogger or a blog-hopper, you’re well aware it’s catching on like wild fire to write an “if you knew me” post. i’m not one to disappoint, so i’m all about jumping on that boat. perhaps that means i’m following the crowd. heck, you might even think it makes me a douche nugget {that’s jess’s favorite word and she now has me saying it}. but, this is my blog, and i’m doing it ¬†because i love this stuff, and it’s probably my favorite thing when bloggers get real. you can stop reading if you really want to. but i don’t think you want to. chances are something i’m about to reveal might entertain you. or at least one of the pictures will make you giggle.

 

if you really knew me, you’d know that…

- i hate drinking water. unless it’s ice cold and overloaded with lemon. or the dasani strawberry kind. that shiz is legit. and while we’re on the topic of drinking, i don’t like most alcohol. i’d prefer iced tea. but i won’t deny a nice cold cider or bud light lime really hits the spot sometimes. or a glass of moscato. or sangria. or a bellini. that about sums it up. the rest, i could live without, and do.

- i spend more time in other people’s homes than my own. when you house sit, dog sit, and nanny, that tends to be the case.

- i’m not interested in fashion, at all, but i like to look good. i don’t pay attention to the runway and i hardly ever flip through a catalog.

- i have a serious sweet tooth. if there’s sugar in it, chances are it doesn’t stand a chance around me. it’s not good for my waistline.

- i’d rather wear chucks than any other shoe in my closet. and i have a lot of shoes. toms and sperrys are close runners up. i prefer comfort.¬†i’m a t-shirt and sweats kinda gal. if i don’t have plans after work, i go straight for my baggy sweats, every time.

- i LOVE going to live sporting events. especially to see the buckeyes or columbus crew. preferably with my brother.

- i’ve made some of my best friends on twitter {that’s you: jess, mandi + meg!}

- if you’re around me 5 minutes, i will have cracked my toes, ankles, and knuckles. it’s a bad habit. i’m sorry if it annoys you. but i won’t stop.

- up until college, i never had allergies. the minute i set foot on otterbein’s campus, i had allergies. they get worse every year.

- i can’t say goodbye with crying. ask anyone in my family, they’ll confirm i’m a weeping willow. can’t help it. certainly can’t stop it.

- if cartel comes on the radio {via iPod, of course}, the volume gets cranked and i’ll punch you in the face if you think about skipping the song. cartel never gets skipped. ever.

- i am anal retentive when it comes to grammar and spelling. i will correct you. count on it. they call me eagle eye for a reason.

- i’ve dated my share of d-bags. please don’t make me list them. the list is embarrassingly long.

- i wasn’t an apple girl until college, now i’ve weaned myself off the PC and am 100% mac. it’s so much better on this side of the fence.

- i grew up thinking i was going to be a marine biologist, living in north carolina, married by 27, traveling with my main squeeze, and having kids before 30. that is clearly not the case. i’m 29, i’m a graphic designer, i live in the town where i grew up, with my cats, i travel with the girls, and i’m nowhere near married or having kids. c’est la vie.

- i hate these things: feet, running, black jelly beans, sushi, pantyhose, dusting, and two-faced people.

- i learn song lyrics really fast, but my short-term memory blows. most of the time, i have no idea what i did 8 hours ago, let alone yesterday. thank goodness for my planner!

- i love nothing more than a good back rub.

- my mom is my best friend on the planet. i talk to or text her every single day. most of the time more than once. i hope i can be the woman she is when i grow up.

- i’ve only been pulled over once and it was my dad’s fault {sorry dad, but it’s fact}. i was doing a good deed and got pulled over because the jeep had no lights…little did i know that when the inside lights don’t work {none of the panels…complete darkness}, the exterior ones don’t either. the cop was nice, and i didn’t get a ticket. oh, and i was laughing when the cop asked me if i knew why he pulled me over. true story.

- i had braces for 4.5 years. i’ve had 5 surgeries and procedures requiring some form of anesthesia: tonsillectomy, 5 teeth pulled, open heart, wisdom teeth removal, gum graft.

- one more thing: i love jesus. like, big time.

looking for the real slim shady? that’s me! hope you learned something new, my little lovellies.

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